Pack your basket – it’s officially picnic season in Kolkata!

 [Published in The Telegraph's My Kolkata on 09 January 2024.  You can read the original here]

Pick Your Picnic

“This is picnic month, no one will come for other programs,” thus spake the official in Arunachal Pradesh a decade or so ago. On seeing a bemused, though quizzical expression, he explained that “everyone takes off to go for picnics”, leaving us to wonder how to get work done. This also got me wondering about Picnic Month in Kolkata. So, here it is - all six weeks of it!

Come Boxing Day on December 26th, the picnic season starts in earnest. The morning after the night before, carrying baskets of Christmas leftovers, babes in arms and other ‘babes’ in tow, extended families would make the traditional pilgrimage to Alipore Zoo. Badminton racquets, shawls, bags and satrangis would then be chucked in gay abandon on the grass along with assorted “uncles” to guard them, while the entourage would go to “check out their relatives” - a favourite, time-worn joke about visiting the primate enclosure.  There’s a positive nip in the air, matched by the nips in the hip pockets of the uncles!  “Sprite” is generously poured out and chanachur packets opened for the relaxing day ahead.  Occasionally, too much Sprite can make sprightly young men a little belligerent, leading to an alternative version of “boxing” day. But it’s all over by the time lunch is served and everyone is happy. A short nap with loud snoring later, the picnic is over and everyone packs up and leaves after checking the cages and counting the children!

Dates for Everyone

Since Picnic Month is limited by time and season there is a mad rush for “dates” - not the ones you pick up from Arabia, nor the luscious ones you pick up at the New Year’s Dance.  These are suitable dates for picnics to be held by various clubs, associations, organisations, parishes, residential complexes and corporations. We are spoilt for choice.

January is full of appropriate dates - there are two holidays on 23rd and 26th, and a bunch of weekends from which to choose. But choices are driven by which competing picnics are being held on the same day.  Some organisations declare their dates well before Christmas with a ‘Save the Date’ message, ensuring a modicum of attendees. Others provide attractive extras - picturesque new venue, boating facilities, large playground, parking space, air-conditioned halls and cottages (yes, for a picnic!) and even pet-friendly environments.  These extras are the icing on the cake. The predominant deciding factors include travelling distance to the picnic spot, transport and the food!

Gourmets and Gourmands

My age will stick out like a sore thumb as I reminisce about picnic food. Back in the day, our Goan community used to have picnics in exotic places like Botanical Gardens. Shibpur. The entire crowd would descend on the spot well in advance of the “action”. The previous evening, the Goan mums would sit around the TT table at the club and manufacture sandwiches in conveyor belt style - one spread the butter, another added greens,  cucumber or tomato slices, another would slip in a salami slice (usually from Lindsay Cold Stores) and the ‘packer’ would put them into plastic or foil for the morning breakfast. The kids - Goans had large families - would be in the next room playing carrom or just chatting.

At the Botanics, as it was called, the Dads would light wood fires and place large dekchis of water for the morning tea.  After breakfast, the Mums would set up the kitchen.  Chopping boards and knives crawled out of various bags, vegetables and meat would be diced into edible bits, ready for the cooking.  The Dads would then get the boiling water started for the inevitable pulao while a quiet kid or two could assist with shelling the peas. Dads would then resort to topping up amber fluids with water and a splash of ice from a flask.  The smells of fresh vindaloo cooking would fill the air with expectancy and open drooling - though satisfaction would be delayed for quite a while.

Meanwhile the rest - kids and gangly teens, sporty types of all ages - would organise team games with much fun and laughter, with a few going off to “explore” the gardens, nooks and crannies. The highlight was the tug-o-war competition.  Simplicity made even simpler.

In many organisations today, picnic advertisements carry the name of the caterer to entice the selective. Details of menus include what delectable snacks will be served in place of the ubiquitous chanachur of yesteryear. Caterers are decked out in full battle regalia, replete with topis or pagrees. Service with trays and smiles ensure that picnickers are imbued with the come-back brand for subsequent years. And Mums and Dads can laze around enjoying the picnic.  This restaurant type of service has now become the hallmark of picnics.

In the same frame, picnic blankets have given way to sash-bedecked chairs and tables, albeit plastic. Umbrellas complete the pretty picture. Languid ladies - clad in sarees, with makeup caked faces - decorate the chairs, resigned to being ‘relaxed’ for the day. The more intrepid are in salwar kameez or jeans and tees, peaked caps and fancy goggles completing the picture. Three-piece suits in yellow and green have also made their garish appearance, but everything goes at a picnic. And everyone has a camera to post memories on Insta or FB. 

There and Back

The good, old, rickety school buses of yore have given way to more sophisticated AC buses. The trip by bus used to be special - everyone wanted to get into the bus where singing, jokes and slightly ribald repartee was most likely!  The popular favourites included Coming Round the Mountain, My Bonnie, You Are My Sunshine, Beautiful Sunday, Bus Mein Chananana Hoi Re, Surangali - some of dubious origin from different parts of the country.  Later, after all the romantic liaisons taking place at the picnic, there would be a reshuffling of the younger set on the way back much to the displeasure of the ‘senior citizens’ in pursuit of a short nap. Many picnickers travel by their own cars these days - this gives them the flexibility to arrive after breakfast and leave after lunch, having graced the occasion. Community bonding is for the rest of us.

Sound of Music

Some organisations, like social clubs, are so diverse that the gathering tends to break into smaller private groups within the picnic. There have been instances where entire office staff have piggy-backed on a picnic as guests of members.  This segregation breaks down when an organiser calls everyone for games.  Young and old, they all arrive with some expectations - mostly to “win”. There have been incidents of open fighting to grab a seat at musical chairs, cheating in various team games, and at least one occasion where the tug-o-war rope broke, awarding equal points to both teams!  No picnic is complete without the makeshift cricket match where the batting team gets an innings to exercise elbow bending on the sidelines. And all this to the sound of music belting out over the local “JBL” (Joy Baba Lokenath, I am told)* speakers hired from the nearby village.  The presence of a music system and a earphone connector prompts picnickers to supply a stream of favourites off their phones to keep spirits up.

In picnics run by some clubs, such as the Dalhousie Institute,  there is karaoke singing and line dancing to add some masala to the music.. The equipment comes into great use during the sleepy hours between late lunch and early tea -- the official time for “Housie”.  Bingo or Tombola by any other name is a whole crowd activity. Smart ass comments from the “caller” add to the enjoyment, calls of “Jaldi Five”, “Line” or “House” from prospective winners lead to loudly expressed disappointment from the rest. Tea is a hurried affair so that “we can grab good seats in the bus”.  

And then the picnic is over - till next year. Or move to Arunachal where I hear picnic month continues till March!